BRAVE mum has shared the struggle of being parent while suffering from mental health issues.

Yvonne Macpherson, 38, from New Cumnock was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder after giving birth to her daughter 15 years ago.

She believes her mental health has been used as a weapon against her at times in her life and wants people to be more open minded about the issue.

The mum of three has even felt she has lost her voice or credibility after others have judged her parental abilities because of her diagnosis.

She wants to highlight how lonely battling mental health can be, especially as a mum.

Yvonne said: “Sometimes it feels like I am hitting my head against a brick wall no matter what I do.

“As a mum with mental illness, you don’t even have baby clinics anymore in the community, health visitors come to your house.

Cumnock Chronicle:

“This also adds to the isolation and not getting out the house to meet other mums at the clinic, where you would pick up your milk, get baby weighed and have a chat with other mums and health visitors, but it was a reason to go out the house.

“I was lucky to have the mothers n toddlers group which was run by mums and childminders and open every day, it helped me to get out the house and talk to other people and also allowed my son to socialise and have structure round snack time to sit with other kids.

“Now I just don’t know where to turn to for help at times or know anyone going through similar situations.

“My mental illness was caused by childbirth, it wasn’t addiction or anything it just happened after I had my daughter 15 years ago.

“Then 12 years later I had my youngest son and when we found out I was pregnant we were told the chances of my illness getting worse were very high.

“Me and my partner saw a special psychiatrist and were well aware that I could get extremely unwell after I had my son.

“I had to come off my mental health medication because it could have caused heart problems for the baby so that was worrying as well.

“Once he was born everything seemed to be fine but the lack of sleep structure, food, and routine does take a toll on you.

“Unfortunately my wee boys dad couldn’t handle how ill I became and decided to leave.

“He had his own issues as well so although it was disappointing at the time I accepted it.”

Yvonne has felt suicidal and hopeless at times after claiming she felt ‘scum of the earth’ and because she has mental health issues.

She said: “I went nine months without being allowed to see my son at one point because of my issues which is a long time for a mother, it was very hard to deal with on top of my mental health issues.

“I became really ill and it was a harrowing time for me and my family.

“I love my son I would never hurt him even though I have these issues.

“I used to have 30 children under my care at a youth centre for the council and I raised two other children, I’m a good mum so it just feels unfair how I'm judged at times I feel because my diagnoses.

“I don’t want to be another statistic for suicide that’s not who I am I want to help people like me.

“But first I need some support myself instead of being made to feel terrible or guilty for being bipolar.”

Auchinleck mental health charity, Release, said: “There’s always another solution - chat it out.

If you are affected by any of the issues raised in this article, please call the Samaritans (f ree) on 116123.

The following organisations also provide support: CALM,, 0800 585 858, Heads Together,, Mind,, 0300 123 3393, Your can also contact: Papyrus,, 0800 068 41 41 or Samaritans,, 116 123.