Mum demands harsher punishments for domestic abuse crimes after she was left battered and abused

Sarah Jane Creevy McDonald, 41, is waving her right to anonymity to remind victims their experience is nothing to be ashamed of.

It comes after the mum suffered a 10 year campaign of vile abuse leaving her ‘surprised she is even still alive’.

She was assaulted, had her bones snapped, her children attacked, and constantly told she would never be good enough.

But now the brave survivor is sharing how she escaped the toxic relationship and went to college to study social work to help others victims.

Sarah Jane was just 22-years-old when she met her abuser in Logan after being taken in by his charm, but although he seemed nice and quiet to others behind closed doors he had a much more sinister side.

Sarah Jane said: “It started with a slap in the face, which I decided to let go… but things soon grew more violent.

“I would be particularly scared during Old Firm games.

“I remember one match his team lost so he smacked me with a crate knocking me out.

“When I woke up he dragged me by the hair to get a cloth to clean up my blood so no one would see what he had done.

“When he broke my fingers he wouldn’t let me go to the hospital until I came up with a story of how it happened.

“We sat in the car trying to come up with something, with my daughter listening to every word.

“The hospital didn’t believe the story we gave them.

“He was arrested, but I still tried to protect him. I always made up stories and tried to protect him.

“My parents later told me, ‘do you have any idea what it’s like to be waiting on someone chapping your door to tell you your daughter is dead.’

“I just started to think it was normal even though he was beating me so much, you just start to accept it.

“They say you’re horrible, you’re ugly, you’re stupid, they convince you no one else would want you.

“I had a slightly low cut top on in the car once and he ripped it off me in a rage when my kids were sitting in the back.

"He even checked my pants after I had been out with friends.

“The impact it has had on my mental health has been horrendous.

“I have been in so many women’s refuges but he would always convince me to go back.

"Everyone else thought he was so nice and quiet he didn't seem like a terrifying thug like how you might imagine.

“But I would be terrified waiting on in coming in from his work because of his jealousy and anger.

“Even when I was pregnant he would hit me, punch me in the face, and drag me along the floor.”

Sarah’s horrific tale comes after new figures revealed domestic abuse happens at least three times a day in East Ayrshire, which is higher than the Scottish average.

Councillor Ian Grant, spoke out about the impact violence against mums can have on children.

He said: “Every one of these numbers is a human tragedy playing out in front of children.

“They will carry the memory for the rest of their days.

“We need to ensure women put in this situation feel empowered to come forward.”

Across the nation, Police Scotland recorded 59,541 cases of domestic abuse during 2017 to 2018.

Sarah Jane now thinks there should be harsher punishments for abusers to reduce the violence in relationships.

“Abusers should be imprisoned, no wonder it keeps happening if they keep getting a slap on the wrist.

“Mine got charged with breaking my fingers but never got jailed. He just kept getting community service because they didn’t want it to affect his career.

“After I got out the relationship he stalked me and I even had to get people from women’s aid to walk me and my kids to nursery and everything.

“That was eight years ago. It still affects my life now because I still need counselling.

"Social workers involved at one point and decided to give us a second chance to sort our family out, but I really really wish they hadn’t.

“Two of my kids now live at my mums but I have contact with them all the time now. He would attack them as well and even got my daughter by the throat once. That was the biggest price I paid for the relationship.

“When I was with him my parents wouldn’t come near me. They didn’t want anything to do with me as long as I was with him.

“But that just left me more cut off and isolated from everyone, which was great for him.

“It is so hard to explain, your head isn’t your own it’s the abusers. They control the way you think.

“Womens aid were great, they let me keep asking questions and help me find answers I was looking for.

“Really it takes you deciding enough is enough, no one can do it for you it has to be your decision.

“But sometimes victims aren’t fortunate enough to realise in time and don’t get out and die in these relationships, but I want to help change that.”

Now Sarah Jane is focusing on helping other women escape abusive relationships.

She is studying social work at college to help other women like herself.

Sarah Jane said: “The last time I was in a women’s refuge I just decided he was playing too many games and I just couldn’t take it anymore and cut all contact.

“You think you can change them, that things will be different, but it never it.

“I don’t want to run and hide anymore, I want to tell everyone there is light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how bad things are it can get better, you can turn your full life around.

“I’m choosing to talk about this now because I carried it for long enough, I have nothing to be scared of.

“I used to feel so ashamed and now I hate the thought of other women feeling like that. I hadn’t done anything wrong, it was never my shame to carry and it’s the same for other victims.

“Men suffer too but they’re ashamed to come forward in case people think they are a coward, but that’s not true. It makes you really brave to come forward.

"I can’t stress enough how I think men and women who are suffering abuse should get out as soon as possible.

“You think you can change them, that things will be different, but it never is.” 

“I still struggle trusting people but I have come a long way.

"I’m married to someone else now and really happy, we have a daughter together.

“I’ve now turned my full life around. I am a survivor."

Karen Gardner, Manager of East Ayrshire Women’s Aid told us: “We would encourage any woman living with domestic abuse to get in touch with Women’s Aid. We know how hard it is but it is possible to take back control of your life and we’ll be there for you every step of the way.

Contact the Freephone 24 hour National Domestic Violence Helpline – run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge. 0808 2000 247. Visit their website on https://www.womensaid. org.uk to find out more information about domestic abuse and get help today.